[AU] there's grief of Want and grief of Cold

[from_the_outside]

She sleeps later than she had the day before – a combination of not having to get up and go to the doctor and exhaustion – and when she comes downstairs, the house is quiet but coffee is already made. After making herself a cup, she pads barefoot to the door and steps out into the crisp mountain morning.

She's unsurprised to see that Bucky is up, and to find Steve's motorcycle gone from the driveway. "Steve head out already?"

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[nerves_of_ice]

Bucky nods. He's sitting on the porch steps, coffee cup loosely grasped in his right hand and steam rising from it.

"First thing," he confirms. "He'll probably call to check in later, once he talks to people. Or text you, or both."

That last is a little rueful. He twists around to look up at her. "Sleep well?"

[from_the_outside]

She comes to sit next to him, wincing a little – the painkillers wore off in the night and she hasn't taken a new one yet. "Like a rock," she admits.

"I hate those horse pills but I have to admit they really do knock me out."

[nerves_of_ice]

"Maybe in a couple of days you can go back and get a topical of some kind," he suggests. "I know they make patches, like bandages, that have some kind of medication built in."

[from_the_outside]

"Lidocaine," she confirms, sipping at her coffee. "He said I could maybe switch to those and regular ibuprofen next week, if the pain wasn't as bad. But he didn't like that this is the second time in as many months I hurt those ribs."

She frowns at the morning, despite the clear skies and fresh air. "But I hate being laid up like this."

[nerves_of_ice]

"Imagine that." A desert couldn't be dryer than his voice. He takes a swallow of coffee, glancing sideways at her over the rim of the mug.

"So you're going to take it easy today, right?"

[marvel_npc]

Something's up with Steve, and Natasha Romanoff doesn't like not knowing what's going on. She doesn't like it at all. Especially not when it's something like this.

He'd dropped by her apartment before nine in the morning to tell her that he'd gotten a lead on a threat, and that he needed her help finding a man named Karpov - a man who's ex-KGB, apparently. (At least he'd brought her coffee.)

She's sure she was able to cover her expression. There's no reason for Steve to know, or even suspect, that she knows who Karpov is probably better than he does. That part of the file had been censored. She knows; she'd checked it herself.

The question is why he was asking in the first place -- especially after an unscheduled, unexpected two nights away from the compound.

Nat settles at the terminal in her apartment, the one that she sweeps regularly to make sure that Tony hasn't added any tricks, and starts trying to figure out just where Steve Rogers has been for the last two days.

[from_the_outside]

She gives him a slightly glum look.

"Do I have a choice?"

[nerves_of_ice]

"Sure, but if you make a stupid choice, you can be sure I'm gonna hassle you about it," he warns her.

[from_the_outside]

She makes a face at him. "Yes, I will take it easy today," she says, and adds, "mom," because she's still only half awake and that always makes her feel a little snippy.

But the coffee helps and the cool morning air is refreshing, and things are... well, if not looking up, not actively getting worse. Which is pretty good, considering.

[marvel_npc]

Harrison cooks – there's no getting him away from that grill when he's here – and they have a nice dinner with steaks and fresh salad and a loaf of crusty bread that she'd picked up at the bakery in town.

At least, she thinks it's a nice dinner. Sharon came back downstairs in a much better mood and James seems to be a perfectly sweet young man.

(He never takes the glove off, and she doesn't ask. She's learned to be discreet with Sharon's workmates.)

She volunteers him to help her with the dishes and has him dry as she washes while in the great room Sharon and Harrison are laughing over something or other. Harrison has opened up the stereo and the two of them are going over records, arguing over what to play, and she can't help but smile as she glances over at them. "Those two," she tells James, "have always been thick as thieves."

[nerves_of_ice]

"You all seem pretty close," he observes, with a quick smile, as he dries the next set of plates. "I noticed the pictures on the piano, too."

[marvel_npc]

"We are," she assures him, smiling. "Even though we give each other a hard time. It's just the three of us, so it's a good thing we all like each other."

It's teasing and tempered with extreme fondness as she glances over her shoulder. Harrison's put on a record and she can guess what it's going to be even before the bright opening notes of "Brown-Eyed Girl" fill the great room. She can hear Sharon laughing even over the sound of splashing water, and when she looks again, her husband and her daughter are swaying in a careful dance that looks more like an extended hug.

Her smile is still warm as she looks back over to James. "Are you close with your family?"

[nerves_of_ice]

He watches Sharon and her father dance for a moment before Amanda's question gets his attention. His smile shades into something a little rueful as he says,

"I was, when they were still around. I'm afraid it's just me now."

And Steve, but that's not something he can explain.

[marvel_npc]

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."

She casts a sympathetic glance his way. "By the way, feel free to stop us if we're prying. I know offering up any kind of personal information can be a tough call in your line of work. Still, we can't help but be a little nosy."

[nerves_of_ice]

"Thanks," he says, simply, and shifts to put a few of the dishes in a clear spot before reaching for the next.

"Don't worry about it." He grins, quick and bright for a moment. "I get that you'd be curious. It's really nice to get the chance to meet you both."

[marvel_npc]

"We feel the same way," she says, warmly. "I hope you're enjoying your visit, though I'm sure you both would prefer it to be under different circumstances."

She rinses off a handful of silverware and hands them over to him. "Sharon's very lucky to have such a good friend."

[nerves_of_ice]

"The feeling's mutual. Absolutely mutual," he says, very firmly. "Sharon's been an incredible friend to me."

He scatters the silverware over one side of the dishtowel and folds the other half over it, drying it all at once with perhaps-surprising efficiency.

"And yes, I am. The house and land are both amazing."

[nerves_of_ice]

He’s tired enough that he’s actually able to get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep before the nightmares force him awake. Still, it’s well before dawn when he gives up and goes downstairs to make coffee.

He settles in at the island counter with his cup, idly brooding over plans and next steps.

[marvel_npc]

Much like his daughter, Harrison finds it difficult to be up and productive at an early hour, but Amanda Carter has never had that same problem. She leaves him to his shower and makes her way down to the center of the house, dressed and as bright-eyed as ever.

She warms further when she sees she is not alone. "Good morning, James," she says, setting her bag down by the door and coming in to make herself a cup of coffee. "Thank you for getting the coffee started; that's a rare treat for me."

[nerves_of_ice]

“You’re welcome,” he says. “And good morning.”

They clearly weren’t kidding about an early start.

[marvel_npc]

She comes to join him at the island as she sips at her coffee and smiles at him.

"I hope you slept well," she says, pulling out a stool and sitting down. "It's nice to see I'm not the only early riser in the house today."

[nerves_of_ice]

“I did,” he assures her. “I just get up early. Like you, it sounds like?”

Hopefully not for the same reason.

[marvel_npc]

"Yes," she tells him. "I've always like getting up early. It was the only time I had to myself with Sharon and Harrison both home. He'll be down soon; we want to get on the road without too much delay."

[nerves_of_ice]

“Oh, but—“ he says, a little awkward. “Don’t you want to stay for breakfast? I’m sure Sharon would love for you to.”

[marvel_npc]

"Bless you," she says, smiling and amused. "That's possible, if Sharon were likely to be awake enough to notice one way or the other. I'll sneak up to say goodbye if she's not down before we leave. How long do you think the two of you will be staying? Maybe we can come for another visit before you head out again."

Her smile has a slightly wistful tinge to it. "Unfortunately her visits home are few and far between, now that she's relocated to Germany. We understand, of course, but... well, we miss her."