[AU] How much - how little - is within our power

[from_the_outside]

 "No," says Sharon, for what feels like the thousandth time. "That's not acceptable."

The rest of the flight had been uneventful, and once they landed she'd been grimly unsurprised to see that Stark had sent Happy Hogan, his erstwhile chauffeur, to guide them to the apartment they've been assigned. Stark himself had apparently gone somewhere to get out of his armor, somewhat mollified by having gotten them here and under his thumb.

Except Sharon won't stop kicking up a fuss.

Hogan stares at her as she inspects each corner of the apartment. "I can't cut these rooms off from the central security protocols," he says, slowly, like he thinks she's just misheard him.

"Well, you can," she tells him. "Or I can force a cascade in a couple load-bearing subroutines that will shut the whole damn thing down. It's your choice."

Comments

[from_the_outside]

She watches him go, and once the door closes behind him, she turns to Steve.

"He's up to something," she says. "I don't like it."

[marvel_npc]

"He probably is," Steve agrees, "but he's not a bad person, and he's calmed down a lot from before. He also likes challenges and problems that no one else can solve. All of that'll help."

[from_the_outside]

"If you say so," she says, doubtful. "I don't know how you can always be so optimistic, but you know him better than I do."

She sighs a little and leans back, smoothing her hand over her mouth. "We should go update Bucky."

[marvel_npc]

"Tony's a friend," Steve promises her. "It'll be okay. I'm sure it will."

He starts to get to his feet. "Did he tell you where he'd be?"

[from_the_outside]

She shakes her head as she gets up, too, thankful for the new lidocaine patch Bucky had helped her with before she'd left to make her call.

"I suggested he go hang out with Nat," she tells him, "but I don't know if he listened."

[marvel_npc]

"Well, we'll find out. I think Nat was going to be training with Sam, Vision and Wanda this morning. Why don't we head over there?" he suggests. "We can swing by the apartment on the way to check."

[from_the_outside]

"Good," she agrees, nodding, and heads with Steve towards the door.

There's no reason to be impatient, she knows. Nothing's going to happen to him here, no matter how little she'd liked Tony's sudden change of heart.

[nerves_of_ice]

The only reason he'd left the apartment is because he'd known, he'd known that if he hadn't he would end up having to answer questions about why - and probably from two or three people, at that.

Sharon had suggested he find Natasha, but Bucky thinks it's a much better idea to let Natasha decide for herself how much, if any, time she wants to spend with him. He figures that probably the place with the best likelihood of being able to spend time unobserved will be out of the high traffic zones and common areas. He also figures that crossing the threshold to the outside might ping some kind of tracker or drone surveillance that he doesn't want to have to deal with yet.

That leaves the boxing ring, the back stairs, and one of the smaller meeting rooms near both that looks to be largely unused, based on the amount of supply boxes he'd noticed when they passed by. Bucky takes the side hallway, crosses the open-air landings as quickly as possible, and goes down the stairs while trying not to look like he's sneaking around.

It doesn't work. "Hey." Sam Wilson's leaning against the wall outside one of the training rooms when he reaches the ground floor. "Want to grab a cup of coffee?"

He doesn't see that he has much choice about it, so he nods. "Okay."

They end up in a corner of the common room. He notices that Sam makes sure to let him have the seat with the view of all the approaches, and appreciates it. He also appreciates that the other man doesn't start in with asking questions or anything of the sort. Instead, Sam tells him about how he and Steve ran into each other in the first place - or rather, how Steve ran past him in circles around the Reflecting Pool.

He doesn't realize he's relaxed until he finds himself smiling at some other outrageous story, this one involving a robot bird.

[from_the_outside]

Bucky isn't in the apartment, and he isn't in the gym. They finally find him in the common room, holding a cup of coffee and listening quietly as Sam Wilson regales him with stories. He looks relaxed and Sharon relaxes to see it, smiling as she enters and hears the tail end of Sam's story about Natasha and what she assumes is some sort of drone that's part of his Falcon get-up.

Steve grins, wide and pleased, and drops into a chair with them. "Redwing is pretty useful," he says. "But it can be a little surprising if you're not expecting it."

[nerves_of_ice]

Sam points at him. "I'm gonna want you to repeat that in front of everyone, man. E-ver-y-one."

Bucky grins back at Steve and pushes out another chair for Sharon.

[from_the_outside]

She sits, listening with amusement as Steve defends himself, saying he'd always thought Redwing was useful. It saves them from having to pass on the news right away, and she's grateful for the brief reprieve.

"Is this a pet or a drone?" she asks, smiling slightly.

[nerves_of_ice]

"Yes," Bucky says, quiet enough to be ignored if that's the preference, and Sam rounds on him. "C'mon, man."

The corner of his mouth twitches as Bucky replies, "Smarter than a drone, I guess."

"Better," Sam agrees, and looks at Sharon. "I'll introduce you."

[from_the_outside]

"Can't wait," Sharon says, dry, but Bucky's smiling just enough for her to be pleased, regardless of how ridiculous Sam Wilson might be.

[nerves_of_ice]

"You'll see. You'll love him. Everyone does," Sam proclaims, and Steve smothers a laugh. Sam shakes his head at him, sorrowfully, and gets to his feet. "I better get back - Nat's running the session with Vision and Wanda on her own," he explains, then looks at Bucky. "Tomorrow morning. We'll go for a run. You in?"

"Okay," he says, a little bemused, a little overwhelmed, but willing enough, and Sam smiles. "Good. I'll swing by." He tips his head back in a nod to Sharon, gives Steve a quick grin, and jogs down the hallway back toward the training gym.

Bucky looks at Steve. "Is he always like that?"

[from_the_outside]

"Like what?" Steve asks, and Sharon laughs.

"He seems very nice," she says, diplomatically.

[nerves_of_ice]

“So that’s a yes, then,” he says, dryly. “Yeah, he’s okay.”

Bucky glances back and forth between them, the question in his eyes silent, unspoken.

[from_the_outside]

"It went okay," Sharon tells him, but there's a distinct lack of enthusiasm in her voice.

"Steve offered to send Rhodey to help the investigation, and I think that helped. But he wants you to talk to a psychologist. He suggested Broussard, but..."

She glances at Steve for his input, and he picks up the dropped thread easily. "Sam's got some more local suggestions," he says. "Ross is reviewing the list now."

[nerves_of_ice]

The previous faint hint of contentment vanishes in an instant, replaced by an unnatural stillness. His glance flicks down the hall toward where Sam Wilson disappeared before refocusing on the two of them.

“Oh.”

Of course Wilson would have had an ulterior motive. He should have known.

He doesn’t ask if he has to. He already knows what the answer will be, knows that asking the question will just reveal how much he doesn’t want to do it. The least he can do is keep that to himself so they don’t worry about what can’t be avoided.

[from_the_outside]

"It's not like that," Steve protests. "He just offered to help. Broussard is a profiler; no offense to the JTTF but I doubt he'd have your best interests at heart."

He half-directs that to Sharon, who shrugs. "You're not wrong," she says. "At least when it comes to his work with the Task Force."

[nerves_of_ice]

He stays still, his gaze shifting back and forth between them.

"I've never known a shrink to have my interests at heart," he says - quiet, calm, and offered as a simple matter of fact. "But I'm sure that the JTTF can use the intel."

[from_the_outside]

"Broussard isn't HYDRA," Sharon says, a little stung. "And neither is the Task Force. Neither of us are going to let anyone like that anywhere near you."

Ross is frustrated, but he isn't cruel. Once he understands that Bucky's more than a weapon, he'll abide by all the usual rules, and not only because he'll have to.

But as much as she wants to, she can't promise that he won't have to talk to anyone, and the guilt is a fist squeezing her guts.

[nerves_of_ice]

His full attention swings to Sharon in an instant, even as he sees Steve shift in his seat. He cuts him off before he can speak.

"That's not what I meant." He manages to keep it level, while inwardly yelling at himself. Lock it down, Barnes! They're putting everything on the line for you, so just lock it down right the hell now!

Bucky draws a quick breath, yanking himself back under tight, taut control. "I apologize," he offers, carefully. "I know you're doing everything you can. Both of you. I'm sorry."

[from_the_outside]

"There's nothing to apologize for," Steve says, quickly. "If you don't want to talk to a doctor, I won't make you. And I'll make sure the Task Force doesn't, either. You still have rights."

Sharon says nothing; what could she possibly offer? The position she's in is a bad one, and she put herself there. She can't meet their eyes, either of them; she focuses on the floor instead.

If she looks up, if she speaks, she's going to have to do exactly what she warned Bucky she would have to do, what he knows she has to do. And she doesn't want to. Not yet.

[nerves_of_ice]

"Not really," he says, turning to Steve. "Not as the Winter Soldier, I don't. Not when it comes to something like that."

He shakes his head at his best friend. "It's okay," Bucky promises him, but what he's saying is meant for them both. "Save the fight for when it really matters. This is fine. It just caught me by surprise, is all."

[from_the_outside]

Steve brushes this aside with customary optimism, and Sharon wonders, a little uncomfortably, if Tony's not correct in his assertion that Steve can't be neutral about Bucky.

"Maybe not," Steve's saying. "But you do as Bucky Barnes. You're still an American citizen and a soldier; that doesn't mean nothing."

"Actually, a psych eval might help with that," Sharon says, finally offering up an opinion. "It can help draw the line between you and the Winter Soldier. I know that's you, too," she adds, forestalling his usual argument, "but there's no doubt you aren't under your own control when activated. Intention goes right out the window."

Her gaze meets his steady one and flickers; maybe they should have held off, after all. She can't imagine how or why he could want her when she's going to be the instrument of so much pain and struggle.