[oom] all those times we looked up at the sky

[from_the_outside]

Karli's on the move; she'll strike soon. Bucky and Sam have been in long, tense conversations with each other and with Torres, and she herself has been keeping an obsessive eye on the tracker blip that is Batroc.

It's a lot. The air in the apartment is tense. But she still has to laugh at the sight that greets her when she walks into the living room: Bucky crouched down, his phone out as he takes a photo of Alpine, who is lounging in lazy grandeur, soaking up a puddle of sunshine.

"That'll be a good one," she approves. "Baby, I've been wondering – what happened to your nice camera? You didn't leave it in Wakanda, did you?"

Comments

[nerves_of_ice]

"He makes it easy," Bucky says, a little dry. He snaps another quick shot and looks up at her.

"It's around here somewhere. I haven't used it in a while."

[from_the_outside]

"He's a good model."

She comes over behind him, her hands landing lightly on his shoulders as she leans down to press a kiss into his hair. "Maybe it's time to dig it out," she murmurs. "Get some high-definition photos of the cat."

[nerves_of_ice]

"No rush," he says, deliberately casual, and turns his head so he can give her a quick smile over his shoulder.

"He's not going anywhere."

[from_the_outside]

"That's true."

She smiles back down at him and runs her hand over his hair. "Don't let me interrupt the artist at work."

[nerves_of_ice]

"He's a living sculpture, that's for sure," Bucky agrees, gravely. He's perfectly well aware she'd meant him, and deflects anyway.

[from_the_outside]

She smiles again and straightens, careful not to let her thoughts show on her face.

The camera. He'd loved that camera. She remembers so clearly the day they'd gone into the city and he'd found it, how happy and peaceful he was later that night, photographing the stars.

That he has it but hasn't taken it out means something, she knows. And it's true that he appreciates the flexibility of the smartphone camera... but it's not the same. He doesn't spend so much time lining up the perfect shot, or editing photos. "Your turn to pick dinner tonight, remember," she says, instead of anything else, as she heads back towards the hall and the two bedrooms along it.

[nerves_of_ice]

"Yes, ma'am," he calls after her, half-laughing, then tells Alpine, loud enough for her to hear, "She's pretty stern sometimes, huh?"

The cat yawns and rolls over, and Bucky reaches to pet him behind the ears as he shifts his phone in his hand and calls up a delivery site. "Come on, you can help me look through the options."

[from_the_outside]

She pauses at the door to the spare room – what's become her 'office' – but doesn't go in. After a second's thought, she heads into the bedroom, instead. "Where was that thing?" she murmurs to herself, opening the closet door. A foggy half-memory from the first day she was here floats to the surface, and she pushes up onto her toes to search along the top shelf. Where –

– And there it is, just like she thought she saw. She grins and reaches for it, fingers just barely brushing the camera bag as she stretches. "Come on," she mutters, nudging the camera case towards herself an inch at a time. "Come to mama – oops – "

She loses her balance as the case starts tipping over the edge of the shelf; trying to grab for it only results in it smacking at her fingers as it falls. She winces as it hits the floor, hoping she'd managed to slow it enough to keep anything inside from breaking.

[nerves_of_ice]

He hears a faint 'thud' from down the hallway and looks up from the phone, frowning.

"Baby? Everything okay?"

[from_the_outside]

"Fine!" she calls back, hoping like hell she's not lying. It's probably vibranium, right? You can't break a vibranium camera by dropping it on the floor.

Sharon leans down to pick up the camera case, then frowns at the floor where it had been, where some thin chain gleams dully against muted colors of the rug they'd picked out. Carefully, she reaches to pick it up, then holds the thing to the light, squinting at it until her eyes go wide with recognition. "Oh my gosh," she murmurs.

One of the pockets of the camera case had come undone in the fall; it must have been tucked inside. She stares at the dirtied, blackened, tarnished chain with its delicate star that was once the beautiful necklace he'd give her so long ago, then carefully coils it into her palm, folding her fingers around it.

[nerves_of_ice]

"Think we should go check on her?" he asks Alpine, who bats lazily at the phone screen. Bucky lets him, for the moment, and calls to Sharon,

"Need any help?"

[from_the_outside]

The question doesn't register; she's too busy looking at the necklace. The star sits against her palm, blackened but still whole, and the chain, she realizes, is in a few pieces. She bends to retrieve a shorter section from the rug and sets it with the rest into the cup of her palm, then runs the pad of her finger gently over it.

She'd never taken it off. Not from the day he gave it to her. Not until the mission.

[nerves_of_ice]

No answer comes back. Bucky frowns and stands up, shoving his phone absently into a pocket as he starts down the hall.

"Sharon?"

[from_the_outside]

She starts and flicks a glance at the door. "Crap," she mutters.

Too late to hide anything; the camera in its case is in her left hand and the necklace in her right. Sharon curls her fingers protectively over the damaged gold chain and looks up as he comes in, only to find herself at a loss as to what to say. "Found it," she decides, holding up the camera.

It's a little weak, but it's the best she's got.

[nerves_of_ice]

"So I see," Bucky observes. He makes no move to reach for it, but leans against the doorframe and gives her a curious look.

"If you knew where it was, why did you ask?"

[from_the_outside]

"I thought I remembered seeing it," she murmurs. "That first day. Baby..."

Very carefully, she uncurls her fingers and tips her hand forward to show him the coiled remnants of her old necklace, held gently in her palm. "I didn't know you had this," she says, very softly.

[nerves_of_ice]

Light glints off the metal in her fingers, and Bucky freezes, staring at it, as all color drains from his face.

"White Wolf," he hears T'Challa say, in the depths of his memory. He can almost smell the green growing scent of the grass and trees there in Wakanda, can see sunlight glinting from the lake and T'Challa's collar and something in his hand as he continues, "I am sorry--"

He doesn't move, nor does he speak. He can't.

[from_the_outside]

Sharon sets the camera carefully down on the bed, her fingers curling back around the necklace, then comes slowly towards him. "Baby?"

She'd taken it off on the Quinjet. Hadn't wanted to lose it, or for it to get broken. She'd left it with Fury. To keep it safe.

Only now does she realize what he must have done with it. "Bucky," she murmurs, as she comes close enough to look up into his face. "It's okay."

[nerves_of_ice]

He shakes his head, and finally manages to look up from her now-closed hand and at her expression.

"He sent it with the news," he whispers. "As proof."

[from_the_outside]

She uncurls her fingers, her hand held up between them, and looks down at the necklace, blackened and broken. She imagines him holding it like this, alone in the hut by the lake, thinks of him gently tucking it away into a pocket of the camera case, unable to bear looking at it, unable to get rid of it.

"I was afraid I'd lose it," she whispers. "Or that it would break. I left it in the Quinjet."

[nerves_of_ice]

Gently, very gently, he cups his hands beneath hers, as if to catch the necklace in case it were to fall. His fingers are trembling.

[from_the_outside]

"I'm sorry."

Her voice is barely a whisper. She drags her glance away from the necklace and up to his face. "I'm so sorry, Bucky."

[nerves_of_ice]

"Not your fault." Low but clear. "You didn't know what he'd do."

[from_the_outside]

She shakes her head and looks back down, lifting her free hand to lightly trace over the metal. "And it was so pretty, too," she murmurs, her voice thick.

"I loved this necklace."

[nerves_of_ice]

He leaves his left hand cupped under hers and raises his right to touch her cheek.

"Remember the night I gave it to you?" he asks, softly.