[oom] the world a cage

[from_the_outside]

This was a bad idea.

She knows it as soon as she steps outside into the cool Brooklyn evening and Bucky locks the door behind them. Her pulse kicks up in her chest the second the lock clicks and she'd give almost anything to tell him she's changed her mind, that she's not going. To slip back inside the apartment and find a safe corner to breathe until this tight spiraling anxiety in her chest loosens.

Instead, she tugs her hood up over her hair and down over her eyes, hating how familiar it is. The hood. The dark clothes. The way every part of her goes on high alert. She hasn't been outside for a full minute and she's already exhausted.

It only gets worse as they go further from the apartment. Brooklyn isn't Madripoor, there are no shadows here where she can hide, no getaway routes she knows like the back of her hand. It's only having Bucky next to her that keeps her from fading back into the darkness and making a run for it, and by the time they get to the meeting spot – a bench along the river in Brooklyn Bridge Park – every nerve is stretched to its limit.

Next time, she's telling Fury just to meet them on a rooftop somewhere.

Comments

[nerves_of_ice]

Bucky nods at the box. “A few,” he says. “In there.”

In addition to the hangings from the walls of the hut, the small wooden wolf that K’senge had carved for him, a grass mat and a string of colorful beads, she’ll find a few items of her own.

“Nakia asked me what I wanted to keep. It’s how I got your blanket, and the glass.”

[from_the_outside]

She takes everything out, piece by piece, laying them out carefully on the table. The small carved wolf makes her smile; so does the string of beads. "K'senge must be all grown up now," she says, as she digs down to the bottom of the box.

"If he didn't get snapped, I guess – oh, wow."

Her fingers brush over tissue before she lifts it out and carefully unwraps it: the silky red dress she'd first worn the night he woke up from the procedure, once they knew it had worked. She shakes the dress out and holds it against herself, flattening it to her stomach with one hand. "I didn't think I'd ever see this again."

She looks up at him, coy and amused. "Wonder if it still fits."

[nerves_of_ice]

His eyes darken with want as he draws a quick, sharp breath.

“Baby.”

[from_the_outside]

Just like she had back during his first visit to Madripoor, she gives him a sharp, warm glance and bites her bottom lip with a smile, willfully playing with fire.

"Maybe I should try it on?"

[nerves_of_ice]

“You should. You definitely should. But if you do it now we’re not going to finish unpacking this box any time soon,” he tells her - half warning, half promise.

[from_the_outside]

"Hmm."

She hangs the dress on the back of the black chair and turns to curve her hand at the nape of his neck and kiss him, just once, hard and sweet. "After," she says, when she pulls back away.

It's been a tough day. They deserve a reward.

For now, she turns back to the box, exclaiming all over again when she pulls out the beautiful cream and gold cloak he'd bought her the first time they went to the market, and –

She takes the tote bag out from the very bottom of the box and hugs it. "Hello, old friend," she tells it. "I missed you."

[nerves_of_ice]

“You carried it everywhere,” he murmurs. “So I just… hung on to it.”

He shrugs and says nothing more.

[from_the_outside]

"I'm glad you did. I love this bag."

It really has gone with her everywhere. All over Europe to Wakanda and back – everywhere but Madripoor.

Out of old habit, she runs her fingers in along the side pockets, checking for anything that may have gotten caught there, and comes up with the beaded bracelet she'd worn her first few weeks in Wakanda, until it fell right off her wrist. She smiles at it and tucks it back into the pocket.

Sharon slips the tote over her shoulder and tucks her thumb behind the strap like she always did, and looks at him. "So, anything you want to take out? How about K'senge's wolf?"

[nerves_of_ice]

“I didn’t know where to put it. Or the hangings. And it all reminded me… well. That doesn’t matter now.”

He looks at the things spread out on the table and back at her.

“Hallway? And the wolf on the table in the living room?”

[from_the_outside]

"Sure," she says, but she's watching him closely before putting a warm hand on his shoulder.

"We don't have to take any of it out, you know," she tells him. "Not if you're not ready for it."

[nerves_of_ice]

Very softly,

“It doesn’t feel right to keep it all hidden away. Not any more.”

[from_the_outside]

She squeezes his shoulder and gives it a little pat, then lifts up on her toes to kiss his cheek. "Okay, baby."

Taking up the carved wolf and the hangings, she casts a glance over the rest of the table. "The grass mat could go in the bedroom, maybe," she says, considering. "By the dresser."

[nerves_of_ice]

He nods agreement and picks it up. “I don’t know what to do with the beads, though. Any ideas?”

[from_the_outside]

She runs the beads through her fingers, considering. "Not sure," she admits, and makes for the door with the carved wolf and wall hangings in hand.

"Maybe we should ask Elaine. She seems like a lady with a lot of opinions about decor."

She's joking... mostly.

The wolf goes on the table, and she glances over at the twin pieces of glass art before hanging up her tote bag and heading to the hallway to hold the hangings one by one against the wall, trying to decide which looks best where.

[nerves_of_ice]

“No. Not Elaine.” He doesn’t explain, instead ducking into the bedroom and experimenting with a few different placements for the mat.

Once he has it situated, he comes to join her in the hall.

[from_the_outside]

She makes a non-committal sound that just means I won't argue that and stretches up onto her toes, holding a wall hanging up as high as she can go on the wall next to the door to the second room.

"What do you think about this one here?"

[nerves_of_ice]

He reaches above her and presses it to the wall with his left hand. "I think it works, but why don't you take a step back for a better angle and see what you think?"

[from_the_outside]

"So helpful," she teases. "Where were you when I was trying to decorate my last apartment?"

(Not the one in Hightown. The last one that was hers.)

But she releases the hanging and steps back as requested, considering it with a critical eye. "Yeah," she says, after a second. "I like it."

[nerves_of_ice]

"Good question. Probably on ice, but give me a date and I'll tell you for sure," he deadpans.

Bucky looks up at the hanging, then at her, and chuckles. "Want to grab the toolbox so we can actually hang it here?"

[from_the_outside]

"Everybody's a comedian," she quips back at him, and grins. "What, you don't want to just stand there holding that up forever?"

But she puts a fond hand on his side and walks around him into the spare room to get the toolbox as requested and bring it back.

[nerves_of_ice]

He keeps his hand planted on the wall and grins back at her when she returns. "There should be both nails and picture hangers in there. And a good hammer."

[from_the_outside]

"As long as this wall isn't plaster, we should be set."

She digs out the hammer and a set of picture hangers, then slips in front of him to reach up and tap the nail of the hangar into the wall near his hand. "Okay," she says, settling back down again. "Let 'er rip."

Or, hang the string onto the picture hanger's hook. Whatever.

[nerves_of_ice]

He lowers the hanging onto the hook and steps back to study it. "Good," he concludes, finally, and flashes a quick smile at Sharon.

"Next?"

[from_the_outside]

She hands him the other wall hanging.

"Same deal on the other side of the door."

[nerves_of_ice]

"You got it." He moves over to the other side and repeats the placement, waiting for her to tap the hook again.