[oom] I'm right here beside you

[from_the_outside]

 Sleep is a joke.

It's not just the intel that she stays up sifting through, blue light straining her eyes; it's not just the coffee she drinks, trying to keep her brain sharp and her thoughts on track. 

It's time.

Minutes that slip away, that she can't get back. Hours that tick ponderously past. She lies alone in her bed and can't close her eyes because if she does, if she sleeps, it's another night gone, another night closer to the day Bucky goes back under and –

So she stays up and works. 

It means that when she waits for him in the morning to come find her before they meet with T'Challa and the others, her skin is pale and translucent and she has that sick feeling of an all-nighter, fatigue poisons running rampant through her bloodstream – but she has a list of observations from her analysis, and two mugs of coffee kept warm on the credenza: one pale with milk and sugar, the other black and as strong as her little coffee maker could handle.

Comments

[nerves_of_ice]

"I'd agree," he says. "Not you, and not Steve. And definitely not T'Challa."

The expression that flickers across his face isn't a smile. It's too sharp-edged to be that, and it fades into cool consideration too quickly.

"But I've got a lot of experience at being a ghost."

[from_the_outside]

"None better," she agrees, and it's wry but not argumentative. "I don't know how to Dora are with surveillance. I'd suggest taking Nakia, if possible – "

By which she means if T'Challa won't murder us for the suggestion. "She knows the lay of the land and she's used to covert ops."

Her mouth presses, annoyed, but she says it anyway: "If you go and I can't be at your back, she's a good second choice."

[nerves_of_ice]

He pulls her a little closer and kisses her temple.

"I'll remember," is all he says.

[from_the_outside]

She huffs like an annoyed cat, but tucks herself to his side without debate.

It's not him she's annoyed at, anyhow.

[nerves_of_ice]

He doesn't laugh at that sound, not even a little, although a flicker of amusement passes through him.

"Feeling stubborn?" he murmurs.

[from_the_outside]

"I trust Ayo and Nakia," she says, which isn't exactly an answer, but the tone she uses is, no matter how neutral she tries to make it.

[nerves_of_ice]

"Got it," he says, quietly. "And I know."

He leans his head against hers.

"We'll figure it out."

[from_the_outside]

"Yes," she agrees, her voice soft in the morning air, "we will."

But for now she just leans against him, the taste of coffee on her lips, and watches the sun slowly climb into the clear Wakandan sky.